Nintendo Switch Thoughts: Such Wasted Potential

MiiThe Nintendo Switch is by far the most disappointing console I have ever bought. Not because it is bad, per se but because I had such high hopes for the platform that it just totally failed to deliver on. I have been enamored with the idea of a portable home console since the original Gameboy came out in 1989. Even with the limitations of poor battery life, one of the worst monochrome LCD screens in existence, the inability to play in low light without a monstrosity of a battery-sucking, glare-inducing magnifier / light, the ability to take my NES favorites like Mario, Zelda, and Tetris was pure magic. With the exception of the ahead-of-its-time Sega Nomad, Handhelds always seemed like isolated ecosystems two generations behind the rest of the gaming world. Even the Vita felt closer to the most beautiful PS2 than a handheld PS3.

Enter the Nintendo Switch. Now, you have a home console that can be played anywhere. Handheld and home games are no longer separate experiences; the same game I play on the TV is the same game I play in the palm of my hand. This was my gaming Nirvana.

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2015 – The Year of Futures Past (Part 1)

TOTAL RECALL FUCK EMThere I was, October 21, eating cake and ice cream and thinking how great I had it, *flash*, everything changes. My flying skateboard turned into some crappy balance-board with wheels and immediately caught fire. My car no longer flies, I have to remember how to tie my shoes, and worse I must settle for imperfect Pepsi! All this because of some kid and his grampa in a DeLorean. The worse part is nobody believes me that this happened. Insane, right? Goodbye 2015. Continue reading

Lucky 2013.

conan-year2000

Now that I am done bitching about 2012, lets look forward to 2013.  While I am massively wasted on boxed sparkling white wine and cheap beer served in plastic cups, I feel that I am truly capable to prognosticate the coming 365 days. Come with me and I will take you to the future of 2013!

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2012: Not The End Of The World

Captjc V6 SmallWell, we are still here so it is that time again to reminisce about the shittiness of the past year while engaging in futile speculation on how the coming year won’t be a festering boil on the anus of history. On the bright side, the world didn’t end and the alien colonization of Earth was foiled, possibly by two plucky federal agents and with any luck will provide the basis for an upcoming movie.

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E3 thoughts.

It is almost the end of the second official day of E3. It was disappointing as there were very few things that caught my eye this year. I have already posted my thoughts on Nintendo’s announcements so this post will be (mostly) Nintendo-free. I am a predominately PC gamer, and occasionally play XBox 360 games. However, not everything was lackluster and there were a few gems to be had.

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